So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
