god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I intend to get homeless drunk
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
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