it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
