Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
