Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
