He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
True college students do jello shots in the library
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
