but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize
