I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Randomize