so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
