quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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