I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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