no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
