"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
