This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
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