do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
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