U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
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