its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I can't turn off my feet"
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
tell me about the eggs
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
