I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize