trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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