I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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