So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
