hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
