Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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