I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
