Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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