Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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