Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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