A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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