So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
