The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
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