i think i have herpe
just one?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka?
Forever.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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