my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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