like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
