My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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