He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
