It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
