I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
