Well apparently he's into motor boating.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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