Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
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Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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