Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
he thought i was a dude.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
