Dual....:-)
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Randomize
