This dress was meant to end up on your floor
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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