i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Randomize
