I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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