He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
