Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
