Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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