'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
