come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
You're a waste of cheezeits
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
