Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
